Zombies and No-Sleep

Lets. See.

Two totally sleepless nights, six months of nightmares, three years of inability to sleep without a night light on and a perpetual fear of ghosts and such that scare me stiff and keep me awake through the night. Thinking, imagining, a black hand creeping from under the bed or a zombie skulking up the stairs.

I have an incredibly real imagination. If you see me sitting still for twenty minutes or so, I'm not really there. I traipse among the stars or go visit heroes of history. I fight orcs or push Frodo into Mount Doom. It's all fine and high during the day, but I turn from hunter to prey at night.

Monsters cut in half crawl and sew themselves back together, then they skulk and stalk me. Pontianaks clatter against the window, seeking a hole to enter through. The night is thick with my fear.

This started a long, long, long time ago. The list at the start is as real as I can remember and started in Taiping. PlayStation 1 was the only PlayStation then, so I was about seven. They, my cousins, were playing Resident Evil. I was scared out of my wits but I stayed and watched with horror, the same horror of a rabbit caught in headlights.

That night left an impression.

I stayed away form any horror after that. The nightmares were horror enough. The challenge was sleeping. Having a light on was fine, but once my eyes closed I was back in the dark. When I didn't sneak into my parent's room, I lay with my eyes open for as long as possible. They would gain weight but I held them up. Soon, I drift into an open eyed sleep and then only would my eyes close.

I still remain cautious regarding horror movies, but there's no lethal poison left in it for me now. At most, maybe a restless night or two. The lights go off but they don't come much anymore. If I suddenly get caught in a spasm of fear, I turn on the light and the shadows fade away.