Bingo's Back

We got Bingo back, in case you don't already know.

Actually, yesterday we received a call from someone claiming to have her. That was wierd because we got her back almost a week ago.

Happy? New Year

Some sang Old Land Sign. Bottles of wine were popped open to herald the coming of 2008, or probably the end of 2007? Almost everyone participated in the countdown.

Well, I didn't.

I spent my New Year scouring the streets in Taipan (a large commercial area beside my neighborhood) looking for my dog. I spent the last few moments of '07 calling out, "Bingo, Bingo."

I woke up determined to give '07 a worthy sendoff, yet I spent its dying moments cursing it. There was no celebration for me. The ushering in of '08 can hardly be called a "happy" new year, not with Bingo missing.

Actually, I spent the final moments of 2007 next to a pub. I heard the countdown, then the cheers, and then the wishes. I heard and I was disgusted.

Maybe not being part of the fiesta but in a state of grief and guilt let me have a look at the pointlessness of Happy New Years. There is nothing concrete about New Years. The bubble bursts and life comes down flooding back on you.

You make resolutions that you forget by next week. The feel good feeling dissapears by tommorow. Life seems worse than ever.

The first time I had a Sad New Year, I find myself stronger and much more resolute than I have ever been before. It is not in joy, but in pain, that we truly grow. What's the point of feeling good for a night if tommorow the world is worse than ever? What's the use of drinking your troubles away?

Whether the new year is happy or not depends on how you take the pain and joys. Which you notice, and which you overlook. It's how you take it, not what you get, that determines how "happy" a year is.

Wishing you the best in 2008

Lost Dog

Bingo (my dog) is missing. She is probably around the USJ area.

If you see her please call 016-3221679.

This is hardly a joke.

Memo to a Patriot

Fight for you country.

Malaysians must be willing to die for their country if any war is started. No, Malaysians are willing to die for their country.

It is only the great patriotism of our civilians and soldiers that allow to sleep in our beds in peace. It is only the knowledge that we are a great, united nation that keeps us restful. It is only the knowledge that we are willing to die for our country that keeps us peaceful.

Study for you country.

Getting straight A's is very important. We Malaysians must be willing to sacrifice so that they might bring academic glory to Malaysia.

If every student studies hard enough, they will score high enough. Don't push the blame on anything else, especially not the government. It is all the students fault if they do not achieve top marks, they didn't study enough.

Work for you country.

Work with an eye on the profits. Money is everything. Work hard to bring riches to Malaysia, which will be used for the benefit of the people of Malaysia.

It is important to work with sincerity, especially do not go snooping around as that is insincere. Mind your own business and pay your taxes, that is all that matters.

Peaceful for you country.

Do not join in illegal activities if the government does not back them. Do not disturb others in Malaysia. Be keepers, not disturbers, of the peace.

It is not the Asian way to demonstrate in riots and perform acts of civil disobedience. Asians sit at home and accept the pain. It is only westerners like Ghandi who call for acts of defing the govvernment.

Not quite the end.

Notes:

This was written in a surge of patriotism after the author returned from horrible, backwater Singapore. The author is proud of his country after comparing the two.

In Johor Bahru, no cars stopped to let an old man cross the road. In Singapore, a car braked to allow an old man cross.

Your Presence, Not Your Presents

The Christmas tree is up, assorted with hand painted ceramic angels and santarinas. Ribbons hang from it, golden lights string it, and right at the top is Woofie (soft toy dog) with a ribbon around her/his neck.

It's a little different from our normal tree, on which everything that passess as an assortment is thrown on it. This year we have a theme. This year we won't have presents.

I won't be around here for Christmas. I won't be giving out any pesents, and I don't expect to receive any.

So, no presents for me. Please, please, please don't get me anything.

Vu Deja Vu Deja

I set out to have lots of fun. I set out knowing I would have fun. I would enjoy every moment the way I enjoy every lick of an ice cream. There would be no need for sleep. My laughs would keep me awake.

But Maxwell Hill 2 was the same as number one. It wasn't even half as fun as number one. It was deja vu gone wrong, screwed up, messed up.

Going on a trip expecting to have loads of fun is probably the one way not to. The trip was suicided by our attitude and by our reason for going. Fun just isn't nearly a good enough reason.

Throughout the trip, it was as if we had done everything before. The train ride was not novel, neither was climbing up Maxwell Hill. Without the freshness, there just wasn't excitement. No excitement, no fun.

By the middle of the trip, I was wishing to come home.

The trip had sad incidents. I kicked someone till he cried. We saw a man whack a boy in McDonald's. We lost a friend. We got irritated by some of the people we expected to laugh along with.

The group split into two. The Handphone Gang didn't care much for cards, human interaction, or board games. Getting the highest score at Jaws! was much more important. The Handphone Gang didn't care for Taboo since it didn't involve talking about hidden parts of the human anatomy. The person I kicked till he cried was from the Handphone Gang.

But what got us most was two sibling's who are too close to each other and a friend who has changed too much to remain friends anymore.

We had hormones, we had witticisms. We just didn't have any fun.

I could barely stay awake.

Let It Rain. Let It Rain. Let It Rain.

Torture.

Torture.

Somebody who likes to make cynical observations will say that we will enjoy anticipating Maxwell Hill 2 more than the trip itself.

It was a shock to find out that the trip was less than two weeks away. Then, even the weeks went and we counted by days. Only four days left!

Four days, three days, tomorrow, we dropped the days and went for hours. 48 hours, 24 hours. Now we're less than five hours away.

If this were a book, the character would have sworn the clock was moving slower. The DOTA game! Bohnanza! I packed my bag this morning. So did quite a few others. Five days of endless playing and frolicking. Considering how slow time stretches on, it seems to boundless, endless.

Yet, the most realistic person in our EYAA group (His name starts with an E) remarks that it will all be over before we even know it. Sounds like a bad thing, but it just proves how much fun we expect to have, we know we will have.

Torture.

Torture.

The Cold that Traveled

I have a cold. I am breathing through one nostril because the other is blocked. Earlier, I was breathing through my mouth because both nostrils were blocked.

This is extremely sad because I battled with a sinus problem for the better part of this year. Sleeping on two pillows and having trouble hearing what everyone else was talking about, all in a day's work.

But, it cleared, eventually, and I was happy. I had my time under the sun. Only to be afflicted again.

I blame Ethan, I blame Bangkok.

Yes, it all started with Ethan in Bangkok. Goodness knows how he got the disease, but he passed it along. From Ethan to A. Sook Ching to Elliot. Eventually, reaching me.

From Bangkok to KL, Thailand to Malaysia, this flu has traveled. Five people down so far, spanning three families and two countries.

I know it's unsavory to wish ill on people, but I am already looking on with anticipation at how many more will fall.

It may not be bird flu, but it means just as much to me.

Two Eyes Looking Over My Shoulder

I have two eyes looking over my shoulder. They belong to Jian Lin.

It happens that these two eyes almost always manage to find themselves onto the stool behind me. Always when I am using the computer for something other than school. Two eyes that must shooed away and, even then, will come back.

Two eyes looking over my shoulder while I am chatting, blogging, and gaming. It appears the owner of these two eyes does not enjoy using the computer so much as watching me use the computer.

Two eyes and a mouth to report back on what I did, who I chatted with, and what I said. What did I play? How long? Shoo! Shoo! Away the two eyes go, back they come.

These two eyes, I suspect, hide a bored brain. Or maybe a brain that finds more pleasure in watching others than taking part herself. It must be pleasure. Certainly there can't be more meaning. Or maybe this person is just like that. Goodness, some people are.

"I smell feeesh! I smell feeesh."

Away go the two eyes to look over a different shoulder. To look over my mom's into a frying pan. Back come the two eyes.

And then the mouth gets restless and starts to sing.

"Two eyes looking over my shoulder. Two eyes looking over my shoulder."

The hands join in the fun and start to beat to tune on my shoulders.

There are two eyes looking over my shoulder, they certainly belong to Jian Lin.

Cruelty, Be Kind

Slap. Turns other cheek.

Slap. Turns other cheek.

Slap. Turns other cheek.

To slap someone three times when they have done hardly anything to offend you is hardly something I would consider clever, witty, brave, marvelous, or satisfying.

Especially when that other person is offering his cheeks.

Die! Die! Die!

Life is totally pointless in the long run. That was agreed. News today, gone tomorrow

What you do will be washed away by time. It may take thousands of years but time will eventually eat up everything.

This thing all things devours:
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.

In 200 years, there will be nothing left to mark our existence but a tombstone decaying, probably flowerless. Our names will disappear from memory. It doesn't matter what you do, you will eventually be forgotten and cast into the shadows where the dead roam.

Resign yourself to the fact that nothing you do matters. We are like gusts of wind. We blow, make ourselves felt, and are forgotten tomorrow.


Maybe, we might be dug up and put into a museum to be stared at for centuries. But, that's as far as you can hope.

Spellbound

Bourne Ultimatum is brilliant. So brilliant that I ended up clapping and laughing like everyone else.

Go watch it.

Seeing Both Sides

We are seeing two different sides of the same thing.

A profound statement that almost always manages to quell disagreements and smother anger. Whichever way you look at it, we're almost always arguing for different sides of the same thing.

Creation, such a juicy, dangerous topic. How were we created? Big Bang? Divine intervention? Round and round the bush we go. The logically gifted scoff at God. The spiritually enlightened scoff at science. Round and round the bush we go.

I am someone who believes in and has a decent knowledge of science. I am also someone who believes that God created the world, the stars, the universe.

What I find interesting is that I can argue, and I often do, for both sides. Arguing for the sake of arguing. That's the problem. My problem.

Phshaw!

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing."

We were to share a ridiculous, amazing, humorous experience in our life. So many times this question has been asked, and so many times I come up with one of the most ridiculous, amazing, humorous story. It isn't even always the same story. Almost every time I tell a new one.

I don't go out looking for these experiences. They happen to me. Almost all of us have, at one point in our lives, gone running in parks. Yet not many would have suddenly found themselves facing a baby cobra.

Helen Keller said the above quote, and I find it fits me, especially the part about daring adventure. To many people I have asked, the weirdest things that have happened to them involve bruises or throwing up.

Many more people say they don''t want these things to happen to them. They are happy to live normal, fulfilling lives. Others say that no such things happen to them. I actually welcome these experiences.

The bizarre, the amazing, even the ordinary turned extraordinary. I look at life as a big joke. Like a clown walking around in too-big-shoes, I see the world in a way few others do. I will do the mad. Hell, I have said hello and shook hands with people I don't know based on dares.

Based just on dares, there are so many things I have done.

I am willing to try anything. I don't shun opportunities because they are unusual. And that has made all the difference.

Crowd Control

We went for a camp in FRIM, all of the EYAA group would be there and I was looking forward to it. One night together with little to do, the prelude to Maxwell Hill 2. Truly, I didn't enjoy it too much.

I enjoyed myself, but only just. I found the camp tiring and exasperating, even as I had a grin plastered over my face. I hid my disappointment well, my mom thought I was having the time of my life. I assume that most others thought the same.

I didn't enjoy myself because, no matter where we went, we were followed by practically all the non adults. It was extremely tiring to have the horde following us everywhere. Because most of the prominent characters are in the EYAA group, and people tend to follow the prominent characters, we were followed everywhere.

It got so tiring that a few of us tried to sneak away to the tent, we hadn't even put on our slippers before everyone was putting on their shoes as well.

The night was the only time when we were truly by ourselves. Five of us slept in the main hall and all five of us said that we enjoyed that time at night the most. We played Pac Man with torchlights, scared ourselves silly with ghost impersonations, and talked about topics as random as DOTA and fainting.

I don't mind the company of the rest, it just got tiring to have them around all the time.

Crowds scare me.